Saturday, December 21, 2013

SM Johnson ~ Celebrating the Winter Solstice ~

snake table holiday corner
It's funny, I have considered myself an atheist for a decade, at least, and yet have continued to celebrate holidays via typically Christian traditions. In my adult life, wherein I don't go to church or celebrate in any particular way the birth of Christ, the obligation to decorate for Christmas has been a chore for some years now.

At first I did it because I had my own house, and could do things my own way, and I was familiar with traditional Christian holiday observations, being that I was raised up Catholic and all.

Thursday, December 19, 2013

SM Johnson ~ My best reads 2013 ~

Good morning, darlings! Happy winter! (This is me putting on my happy face. Note that what appears to be a smile is, in fact, gritted teeth. Also note that I am bundled up like an Eskimo while inside my house. Also note... eh, never mind. Whining really doesn't help. Much.) This is pretty much my writing uniform - what I look like when I spend all day holed up at home in my pajamas.

I clean up a little better when I am forced to go out into the world, I swear.

Kyle the snake stopped eating about two weeks ago. Then he got extremely shy and started hiding all the time. So, me being concerned (and probably annoying), I got a flashlight and spied on him. His eyes were milky. Hmm.... milky eyes, check; refusing food, check; hiding more than usual, check. Kyle was preparing to shed his skin. It's very winter here (have I mentioned that?), and the air in the house is so dry that skin feels like paper and more than one of us has had dreams about filling the hot tub with lotion and just having a good roll around in it. Dry is not great for reptiles shedding. I moved the humidifier across the room from Kyle, kept it full, and even turned the fan up a couple of notches. I moved it across the room because it does blow out damp air, but that damp air is COLD, and of course, I really wasn't going for cold and humid.

Thursday, December 5, 2013

SM Johnson - Whoops!

Good morning, Darlings. Here we are, Thursday noon, and I forgot to invite ya'll over for coffee. My bad. In my defense.... snow snow work snow snow snow snow snow snow snow snow. No school. Snow. Snow. Snow. No school again. Snow snow snow. And finally, sunshine. And COLD.

It continues to be difficult to fathom why we still live here, but whatever. This is winter.

I have a hodgepodge of thoughts to share today, so bear with me as I topic jump.

Thursday, November 28, 2013

SM Johnson ~ Slithery slinky kinky pets?

Good morning, Darlings! C'mon, c'mon, pour a cuppa joe and have a seat so I can catch ya'll up on all the latest news. I KNOW, I missed coffee last week, and I hate that, but... (shrug) well, what do you do? Can't be helped sometimes.

This is what happened... the Friday before last, Kyle showed up at my husband's office, and we realized that he was basically homeless and was going to freeze to death over the winter if we didn't do something to help. So I spent most of a full day figuring out some kind of acceptable housing situation for the poor guy, but we finally seem to have that nailed down... only to have him turn up his nose at almost every single food offering.

Thursday, November 14, 2013

SM Johnson ~ This place called Earth ~

Feeling melancholy. Some of it has to do with work stuff that can't be talked about here; some if it has to do with having just worked a couple of night shifts and being just plain out tired; mostly it is probably the dread of the oncoming winter, and feeling like I'm really struggling with my NaNo novel - how nothing is really clicking along yet.

Well, you know, the porn part is going fine. It's the PLOT that seems to be missing. (Growl).

I should probably go read some Nanowrimo Pep Talks, hmm?

Thursday, November 7, 2013

SM Johnson ~ Calling the Tune ~

Good morning, darlings, and welcome to Thursday Morning Coffee. Pour a cup and check out the work of British author Debbie Bennett. I first read her book Hamelin's Child after reading a more negative than not review, and I adored it. The story was about a boy named Michael who was kidnapped and made into a heroin addict and put to work as a prostitute. (Mmmm, SO deliciously dark).

It was followed up by Paying the Piper - and now the final installment, Calling the Tune has been released. So yay!

Wednesday, October 30, 2013

SM Johnson ~Dia de los Muertos

It is.... el Dia de los Muertos - the Day of the Dead. And I have a gift for you. Well, sort of. I mean, you'll have to click your cute little mouse over to CreateSpace and walk your happy little fingers through the ordering process AND pay for it yourself - but STILL.

I am just the messenger, really.

And I bring you this message of a great and shining joy, the kind that will leave you curled into a ball, rocking, and possibly tearing at your skin and your hair and wishing you could unsee what you have seen. And I know (soothe and pet) that you'll never be the same, ever again, but there is no help for it, and I will be so proud of you.

Doesn't this sound like a wonderful gift?

Are you ready? Drum roll, please...

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

SM Johnson ~Erotic Audio Excerpt ~

Presenting .... Season 2 of BDSM Bedtime Stories, brought to you by the BDSM group on Goodreads.

Last year Dominant Sirly Eric read an excerpt of my book Above the Dungeon for Season 1 of BDSM Bedtime Stories, and this year he's reading an except from Out of the Dungeon. Mmmm. His voice is AMAZING, and he does a GREAT job. He brings both Roman and Dare alive, so you've just got to check it out.

Thursday, October 17, 2013

SM Johnson ~ Messy Amazon ~

Good morning, folks, and what a beautiful morning it is. Not that I'm going to notice - I worked nights last night, so I'll be cozily tucked into my soft warm bed for most of the day, dreaming the good, the bad, and the ugly.

The Amazon debacle - good lord, this was crazy.

I had my little floor-rolling, fists-flailing tantrum and did a tweet and retweet campaign, some emailing, some bitching, possibly some contacting of the ACLU and the NY Times... and something in there worked, because Amazon sent me an email that they again reviewed Out of the Dungeon and determined it does not violate their sparse and arbitrary content guidelines.

Sunday, October 13, 2013

Erotica Authors - Amazon Censorship Alert

Well. It seems one of my books has been censored by Amazon.

I received two emails.

The first is this:


During our review, we found that the following book(s) is in violation of our 
content guidelines (see list below for details):

Out of the Dungeon (ASIN: B005ZJ4TX0) - Description, Cover Image

If you wish, you may make changes to your book (images, title, description, and 
interior content) to comply with the KDP Content Guidelines and re-submit it for 

Thursday, October 10, 2013

SM Johnson ~ The Difference ~

Good morning, Darlings. It's National Mental Health Awareness week. Or something kind of sort of close to that. Which I didn't actually know, but Nicole Knepper from the blog Moms Who Drink And Swear told me.

So in honor of that, I'm going to link to Nicole's blog because she is funnier than shit, and then I'm going to talk about the difference between being crazy and being a writer.

Thursday, October 3, 2013

SM Johnson ~ Life is messy ~

Good morning, darlings, and welcome to coffee! I'm changing things up just the tiniest bit since my foray into paranormal romance is on hiatus. There are so many things I want to write about - and my themes seem to be getting more and more Dark. The vampires are just one small element, and while I plan to write one more book in the Dungeon series - this one featuring Dare and Thomas - I'm not sure if there will be more after. I felt the common thread between vampires and dungeon masters was adorably "things that go naughty in the night" - the commonality in my more recent projects seems to be "life is messy." 

Friday, September 27, 2013

SM Johnson ~ Missing Coffee ~

Sorry darlings, no coffee this week. Forgot to plan ahead, and now that I'm working night shift, the mornings are kicking my ass. On the other hand, I'm almost done with the first draft of Jeremiah Quick since sometimes while working nights I get to write - sometimes I get to write a lot, which is pretty awesome and amazing, and makes me feel okay about sleeping a good bit of the day.

Both staying up all night and sleeping all day feel very, very decadent. Except when it feels very, very tired (grin).

We shall resume Thursday Morning Coffee next week, k? Thanks.

Thursday, September 19, 2013

SM Johnson ~ Watch it grow! ~

Good morning, Darlings. Welcome to coffee. Little bit of a different sort of ramble this morning, because I'm doing some squee and oosh-oosh over my plants.

When is the last time you planted a seed and really paid attention to the result? For me, it was, seriously, a bean sprout in second grade.

A couple of years ago I helped my husband and Sprite plant a small vegetable for the neighborhood rabbits, and I planted seeds, but I didn't hang around to watch them grow.

Thursday, September 12, 2013

SM Johnson ~ More Miley ~

I know, not that there's not much more of Miley Cyrus to see, right? (Heh. That's a joke. Laugh).Welcome to yet another installment of The Miley Circus! Since everybody's talking about Miley, I figured I'd better talk about her too. Even though I'm admittedly a bit late to this party - but that's nothing new - I tend to be lost in my own little world most of the time.

What alerted me to the discussion of All Things Miley was a question from my ten-year old daughter. "Mom, what, exactly, did Miley DO that has everyone so mad?"

Thursday, September 5, 2013

SM Johnson ~ Birthday Presents ~

Good morning, Darlings, welcome to coffee, and happy birthday to me!

The husband is desperately trying to get me to tell him a something he can buy me for my birthday, but honestly, I must be all filled up at the moment, because I can't think of a single thing, much to his dismay. He'd love for me to say, "Yeah, get me THIS, in blue or yellow," so he could skip off and do that.

But he can't, because I am well-satisfied.

Thursday, August 29, 2013

SM Johnson ~ Not Afraid to go There ~

Good morning, Darlings, and welcome to Thursday! (Tomorrow's Friday, yaaaaaay!)

I am simplifying my blog titles (pauses for golf claps and, alternatively, choruses of Um, okay, so what?). I know, I know. Ya'll are aware that this is Thursday Morning Coffee, so I'll skip that bit, as far as titles go. Perfect. I'll keep my name in there, just so you know who I am in your Twitter Stream. I'm already lost in the phone book, hate to get lost in Twitter-ville, too.

Thursday, August 22, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ Who do you trust?

Good morning, darlings, and welcome to a very brief coffee break. Today I'm asking a question, for both readers and writers.

And the question is...

Who do you trust?

Readers - who do you trust to recommend books that you will love? Reviewers? Bloggers?  Book blogs? Goodreads? The NYT best seller list? The fact that a book jacket or description tells you it is a best-seller?

I'd love it if you'd drop names (links) in the comments about the people who've proven trustworthy for book recs, for you.

Thursday, August 15, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ Group Dynamics

Good morning, Darlings, and welcome to coffee! I have a confession to make: Last week Thursday came and went and I didn't even notice, and hence, there was no coffee. I do apologize. It's summer. Life gets crazy, you know?

We humans are social creatures who adore validation, and as such, we tend to seek others of like minds. Some people find churches and community groups to feed this need, or regular gatherings of "girlfriends" groups, girls night out, boys night out, story time at the library. There are Real Life quilting groups, scrapbooking groups, bookclubs, singles meets, etc and etc and on to infinity.

Thursday, August 1, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ My People

Good morning darlings, and welcome to Time Moving Consistently. (Slaps hand to forehead). Wait, that's Earth. Umm.... how about we have Thursday Morning Coffee today? Yeah, sounds good to me, too.

Have I mentioned here how much fun Type 2 Diabetes is? I only bring it up because recently it's come to my attention that my blood glucose is running high, which is annoying, and exhausting, and frustrating... and pretty much makes eating not very fun at all (because I am being a control freak trying to avoid medication, and IT'S NOT WORKING). And why is this relavent? Well, let me tell you... the one thing I have so far refused to give up since my diagnosis in 2009 has been real sugar in my coffee. Two teaspoons. It hardly seems like anything.

Thursday, July 25, 2013

SM Johnson ~ Thursday Afternoon Extra ~ My Reads 2013

Good afternoon my dear, dear darlings. Such a lazy little brat I was for TMC this morning, posting an unedited excerpt and all, that I've decided to add a chattier post for ya'll. Because, um. well, it's my blog, and I can do that if I want to.

I'm going to talk about my 2013 reading list, which is tabbed up top there on the far right, the one that says My Reads 2013.

I've never kept a complete reading list before. Oh, I have lists of authors, and small notebooks filled with books I've read from back in the day when going to the library was a weekly occurrence and I'd bring home books I'd already read and have little kicky-feet fits.... and I have lists of authors I love, and authors I hate, and which books in which series that I OWN, and which ones that I desperately WANT (this, for visiting rummage sales mostly) - but a public list of what I've been reading? - nope, never done that.

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ Jeremiah Quick excerpt

Good morning, Darlings, is it Thursday already? How it always creeps up on me, I'll never know, but here we are.

So because it's late and I'm lazy, and all is right in my little world, I thought I'd share a (very rough) excerpt of my WIP, Jeremiah Quick.

That is what you come here for, right? Info and writer news and sneak peeks into books, more so than long rambling blog posts about head injuries and emotional messiness....

So let me oblige you! (And maybe by next week I'll write a synopsis, so you can get a better sense of what this book is about. Ha. Wouldn't that be just lovely?

Thursday, July 18, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ Life, Earth, Whatthefuckever

Oh, my darlings. This is not good, my headspace is not good, and I should not be writing this here. I should be in a Word document or creating a secret blog for this crap and not spewing it all over in public like this and under my own fucking name and everything... but ahhhhhh..... what. the. fuck. ever.

I promise myself a post for Thursday Morning Coffee, and so.... here we be. I suggest you just stop now and go find something much more entertaining to read (might I suggest StumbleUpon?), because nothing good is going to come of this sobbing whining self-pitying hopeless garbage.

It all started with a tremendous knock to the head. The details of this are unimportant and implicate someone who already feels terrible about it, so never mind.

Thursday, July 11, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee~ Dare and Thomas

Good morning, Darlings, happy Thursday! Welcome to TMC: The Mighty Conundrum or... Teasing My Critics...

Every once in a while I go browsing for reviews. I know! It's bad! It's arrogant. It's being desperate for feedback from people who don't love me. A terrible thing to do.

But I admit I do it. Every few months I find myself surfing for reviews. Perhaps a little more often than that if I've had a recent release. I don't obsess about it, but I definitely have an appetite for learning what people think.

Thursday, July 4, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ Read This Book

Good morning, Darlings, and welcome to TMC! (Too Many Confessions or Tween Mini Convention or....)


Thursday. Morning. Coffee.

On Independence Day.

I'm going to be in a parade. Well, let me qualify that. I'm going to be in the air-conditioned cab of a tow-truck float in a parade. My child, with her co-actors for an upcoming play, will actually be on top of the truck-float, doing all the waving and tossing candy and such.

Thursday, June 27, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ Something to Believe in

Good morning, my darlings! Welcome to This Makes Complete (sense)... To More Congruence. Or Think More Coherently.

Or just.... Thursday Morning Coffee. Yes. Go, pour yourself a cup. I'll wait, because we're going to get a little bit serious this morning.

It's a good week, in some respects. DOMA was invalidated yesterday June 26, 2013. Read the details from Huffington Post.

Per Wikipedia: The Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) (Pub.L. 104–199, 110 Stat. 2419, enacted September 21, 1996, 1 U.S.C. § 7and 28 U.S.C. § 1738C) is a United States federal law that allows states to refuse to recognize same-sex marriages performed under the laws of other states. Until a portion of the Act (Section 3) was ruled unconstitutional in 2013, DOMA (in conjunction with various other statutes) had also effectively barred same-sex married couples from receiving federal marriage benefits.

Thursday, June 20, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ Interview with the Vampire DeVante

"How can I help?" I ask, feeling her restless anxiety, as her desire to curl up and sleep attempts to overrule her sense of blog obligation.

"Really, DeVante? You would write something for me?"

Hm. Writing in her stead was not exactly what I had in mind. I had thought I might wrap my arms around her and breathe sweet sleep into her, hold onto her for just a little, while sending her odd and quirky dreams. It is good for us to connect that way. It serves purpose on both our parts. But no... she has a new boy she stays up too late with, and a husband she neglects far too often, and he gets my bedtime girl. She does not need my help to sleep. Not now.

"You've been gone for eons," she chides. "It would be lovely if you wrote something for my blog."

I care not about a blog. I think it is silly that she stresses and worries about such drivel. But that is me. And this is all about her.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ Jack Reacher

Good morning, darlings, and welcome to Totally Manipulating Carnivores. (Eh, you say? Heh, I say. My work here is done).

Kind of a weird topic on my agenda, yeah, I know, but have you SEEN the Jack Reacher movie? Movie fans, what did you think?

Okay, now....... fans of the books written by Lee Child featuring the character Jack Reacher - what did you think?

Here's my take.... the movie was pretty much okay. I mean, it followed the book and everything, and even if I couldn't buy into Tom Cruise as my beloved Reacher, it was still a fairly entertaining flick. The trouble with Cruise is.... A) he's not TALL enough. Reacher is like.... 6'5" and built like a brick shit-house. Sledgehammer hands. Way more.... the Rock than Tom Cruise. (Besides... Cruise is pretty much to the point in his career where the only character he can play is.... Tom Cruise. You know?

Thursday, June 6, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ Supremely Lazy Blogging

Good morning, darlings, and welcome to Too Much Carousing. Um.... This Many Crackers? No? Awwww, crap. Caught me again. It's still Thursday Morning Coffee. Dang. I can't ever seem to fool you guys. Must be on to me.

I suppose you are wondering why the title of this post is "Supremely Lazy Blogging," so I shall tell you. It is because my Saints and Sinners pictures are still trapped on my phone, and I want to post about Saints and Sinners, but it's is 1:37 AM and I am way too tired to deal with getting the pictures OFF my phone and into this blog post.

Thursday, May 23, 2013

SM Johnson ~ Thursday Morning Coffee ~Happy Saints and Sinners week!

Good morning, Darlings, and welcome to This Much Craziness - or "to much to do before heading out tomorrow."

I'm off and running to New Orleans this week, hoping for lovely weather and fun people and Bourbon Street and... fleur di lis and just... all the wonderful happiness of the French Quarter.

In honor of my being able to attend the Saints and Sinners Writer's Festival, I've arranged for Three in the Dungeon to be FREE from AMAZON,  May 23rd through May 26th.

So feel free to click HERE to grab it (check price before you one-click buy it, though - in case Amazon fucks up and it doesn't list for free, because this has been known to happen).

Also - HAHAT (Hop against Homophobia and Transphobia) continues, so if you haven't, check out my post from last Thursday, and visit the hop itself - where something like over 100 authors are speaking out about homophobia and transphobia in an effort to stop the hatred (and offering prizes at every stop).

Have a great week, a safe weekend, and yeah, sure, I'll have a drink for you.

Thursday, May 16, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ F*ck OFF, homophobia

click for HAHAT blog hop
Well, now, I received a reminder that I'd signed up to write a blog post for the 2013 Hop Against Homophobia and Transphobia, and it's on a Thursday, and how convenient is that? Pretty fucking convenient, I'd say, since I had not a blog topic in mind because my brain is already imbibing alcohol on Bourbon Street, waiting for my body to catch up... (she says, as if she EVER has a topic outlined with neat bullet points or hashtags or whatever prepared in advance. Ha. Who's blog did you think you were visiting?)

Good morning, Darlings, and welcome to Trans Modified Cadets... er... Tripps Modeling Calves (Tripps being pants, calves being legs, get it, get it? No? Aw shit, never mind). Okay, okay, right again, this is your regularly scheduled Thursday Morning Coffee broadcast.

Welcome. We love you here. Well, I love you. I don't even know who the "we" would be. Voices in my head, perhaps,  or the "rest" of me.

International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia is May 17th. (Which, should, by my best scientific calculation, be today). [Hee - go ahead, laugh at me, total date FAIL]

Thursday, May 9, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ TMC Free Reads

Good Morning, darlings, and welcome once again to The Mighty Crayon. Uh. Wait. The Marvelous Clan? Or how about... This Magnificent Club.... Oh, okay, never mind, it's just your regular broadcast from Thursday Morning Coffee (wink). I hope that's what you've come for, at any rate.

This being the month of May, the month of the Saints and Sinners Literary Festival, and the fact that I get to go to one of my favorite places, New Orleans... I am going to offer Three in the Dungeon free on Amazon while I am away getting drunk on Bourbon Street learning more about my craft, from May 23 through May 25th.

Thursday, May 2, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ A Tiny Sip

Good morning, darlings, I hope you're having a lovely Thursday. Go pour yourself a cup of coffee - (Why yes, I'll have some too. Thanks).We in the upper Midwest are relieved as all get out to welcome May and to report that April's fucking-crazy-snow-shit-bastard has MELTED. Thank the gods for that newsflash, hmm? That's the "pro." the "con" is the whole world here looks dirty and ugly, now.

How much snow? According to some source or another, FIFTY-ONE fucking inches.

Yanno... it's not that it falls, and it's not that I have to drive in it, or wear my Sorels (mine are NOT this cute, for the record) for days on end - it's that you have to move the shit... off the car, off the porch, off the driveway... which is highly inconvenient. It's also that I kept getting my car stuck and needing to call in "boss's wife-pretty-please-with-sugar-on top" begging kind of favors, when I know the drivers (and the boss) are tired as hell and probably more sick of the white stuff than I am. (Why yes, I did notice that the driveway was FUCKED for the second time, and yes, I chose to attempt to drive into it anyway. I will be a stubborn creature of habit).

This is a stupid, stupid place to live. But... it is what it is.

Thursday, April 25, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~

Good morning, darlings. I suppose ya'all are looking forward to the weekend, which for me is the end of a seven day stretch off, and the beginning of a 6 out of 7 day stretch on. Yay me. And they've been calling every day to offer (beg?) me some extra shifts, which, frankly, instills a sense of dread in me, wondering what I'm in for. But there's no use worrying - we shall find out soon enough.

This is the first Thursday this month that hasn't been marked by significant snowfall. It's been the weirdest month ever, with school being closed last Friday and the Friday before - each time because of 11 to 12 inches of sticky heavy white snow, at a time of year when we are desperately ready to be done with all this weather aggravation. It's planting season, for fuck's sake.

Sunday, April 21, 2013

War: Allie's War Book 6 - available now

Good morning, darlings. Monday post today.

Have I mentioned JC Andrijeski's Allie's War series here, like ever? (Quirked eyebrow, little frown).

Oh? I have?  here and here and here and, most importantly, HERE.

Well, I suppose. It is my favorite series of my whole life. Perhaps I've said that a time or two, as well.

(Bright smile). Well, then, good! So today all I have to do is announce that War: Allie's War book six is now available as an ebook format! Yay!

If you've been an Allie's War fan, then of course you need to go buy this book, soon, sooner, soonest. Like GO. NOW. BUY.

I can't get enough of Allie. And especially of Revik. Come on in, your friends are here. What are you waiting for?

Thursday, April 18, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ Tatts and Stripes and Snow, Oh my!

Happy Thursday, darlings!

I wrote about my tattoos and posted pics over at tumblr, so feel free to check that out. (Ignore the couple of typos... I have no idea how to edit anything over there). I'm sure I've done it already over here, but maybe the story is a little more evolved this time around. Or maybe not.

Thursday, April 11, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ I have no idea

... what I'm going to write about today. My blissful string of many days off in a row is coming to an end. Today is the last one. It has been exceptionally lovely, and I'm hoping for a repeat... repeatedly.

I have written 16,600 words of a new and very dark book. I knew all this dark reading was going to take me somewhere deliciously unpleasant. It has also brought some astonishing pleasures to me, and more laugh-out-loud correspondence than I've had in awhile.

Life is certainly a journey.

Anyway. If I follow that thought train, it's going to go deep. So how some dark instead?

Monday, April 8, 2013

SM Johnson ~ Catching up with Vampire Diaries ~ caution, whining ahead

Real rainbows. My camera.
Damon is beautiful, especially on big screen. Love the little grin. Mmmm. Kind of Lestat, kind of Brian Kinney. What's not to like?   Yes, I get to snuggle into my chair and stare at The Vampire Diaries. Fucking migraine. There are parts of this show that are stupid, like the fact that these clearly adult people keep going to high school. That, and they have about a million different talismans to protect them from vampires, to point to vampires etc, but they don't pay attention to them, even after they almost die. I give you this talisman in all seriousness, with intense drama eyes (beautiful), and tense lips. So make sure you IGNORE it, because you are ultimately TSTL.
Argh, Elena. You are an idiot. But Damon is still eye candy. I'm watching season 1, episode 12. I love television so much it's taken me about a year to get this far.
stolen from tumblr here

Thursday, April 4, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~

Ahhh, good morning, my darlings, although it will likely be closer to noon when you get a chance to read this. I do apologize. I know that the pounding, keening lack-of-caffeine headache is a whore. So feed her with your favorite coffee, so she'll run off and find someone else to proposition.

I show you my favorite Thursday Morning Coffee pic because the sun is out and the snow is melting, and it is exceptionally lovely... and because I adore spring. I was blinking hibernation-fatigued eyes yesterday, adjusting to this new brightness, and tying very hard not to run over with my car very many of the children who were chasing balls and riding bikes. People get very wound up when you run over their children...

Thursday, March 28, 2013

SM Johnson ~ Thursday Morning Coffee ~ Honestly

Well this is very strange. I wrote and scheduled Thursday Morning Coffee yesterday, and somehow the muddling thing disappeared.

Probably just as well, really, because I was having a total bitch fest,  deeply upset by the idea of people reviewing and rating books they haven't read. This is so one of my hot buttons.

Positive or negative, if the thing hasn't been actually read by you, personally, you really aren't qualified to write a review. This should be a no-brainer, shouldn't it? How can you have an opinion, particularly of a book, if you haven't experienced it?

All right. I'll jump off the box now, nobody's listening, anyway.

Saturday, March 23, 2013

SM Johnson ~Arrrggghh! Typos! ~

Oh. My. God. I finished reading this wonderful, terrible, beautiful, awful manuscript called Psychomotor Agitation: by the astonishing (legendary?) XIX... and am, for the moment, ruined for reading other authors.

Oh, it will pass, surely. As soon as I read everything by XIX (click the squares, then click "show this deviation anyway") that I can set my greedy little eyes upon.

In the meantime, I'm reading my new release on my kindle, and have found an embarrassing number of typos. And I mean a horrible, gut-wrenching amount of embarrassing typos.

Sigh. I do apologize.

I will be uploading a new file, probably sometime today.

If you've received a free copy directly from me, you'll have to suck it up.

If you've purchased it on Amazon, I'd advise waiting a couple of days before starting to read, because Amazon should send you a notification of an updated file. I think it takes up to 24 hours for the new file to go live.

That's it, I'm firing my copy-editor.

Self - you're fired.


Perhaps one day I should HIRE one. Trouble is, most of the typos I INSERTED MYSELF while editing... because I can't ever stop tinkering.

Peace, darlings.

Thursday, March 21, 2013


Three in the Dungeon, available NOW, exclusively at Amazon! (For the time being).

Amazon status for Three in the Dungeon.... "Publishing." It shall be there soon, my darlings!

Meanwhile, there is an ugly orange truck outside my house, and some really cold guys cutting down our tree. I mean cold in a couple different ways - first because it is 14 degrees out there, and I'm sure they are COLD. Second because it is the only tree in our front yard, and the cold bastards are cutting it down. I could just cry. I love trees, and we only have 2 live ones and one dead one in our yard - and after now it will be 1 live one and 1 dead one. Damn it.

Monday, March 18, 2013

SM Johnson ~Three in the Dungeon ~ FRIDAY!

Here we go... Coming FRIDAY MARCH 22nd!

Is love enough to forsake power exchange?

Life is good for long-term partners Roman Preston and Jeff Johnson; living in Gigi's house in Minnesota, Roman's got his woodshop and cabinet contracts, and Jeff his writing, and they're building a loving egalitarian relationship. Everything changes when Vanessa and the baby move in, of course, but they all seem to be settling happily into family life.

But when Jeff's BDSM erotic fiction becomes the latest Amazon Indie success story, Roman can't help but wonder… if Jeff is still kinky in his head, what about his heart?

The synopsis is pretty simple, honestly not sure if I'll leave it like that or what, but the truth is SO MUCH happens in this book, that if I try to tease everything in the synopsis, it will be information overload. So I'm still sort of working on that.

Built the table of contents today. Added all my copyright stuff, including a credit to the AMAZING cover photographer, Karina Tischlinger, made sure the chapter breaks are in place... blah blah blah blah ***insert mind-numbing-ly boring formatting tasks here***

I will be uploading to Amazon Wednesday night, so if there aren't any glitches, it might be available slightly earlier than Friday.

If you buy, if you read, and if you find any typos, I would be ever so grateful to hear from you. Seems a few here and there always sneak through, or get in there fresh during the editing process. Drop me an email or a comment with the word, phrase, or sentence that contains the typo - that's all I need to seek and destroy. I'm a Virgo. I'd rather fix it than let them be out there embarrassing my perfectionist self.

Peace, darlings.

Thursday, March 14, 2013

SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ Don't

I have been talking to beta readers and working diligently on getting Three in the Dungeon ready for release on March 22nd. It's going pretty darn good, if I do say so myself.

And I read something.

Well, I am always reading something, of course, but between yesterday and today, I read something remarkable. It was an ebook, but I have ordered the paperback because now I must hold it in my hands and flip through the pages and keep it on my bookshelf FOREVER.

Genre(s): Gay, Romance, Suspense, BDSM

"Don't... open me."

Three simple words that tease Jack, taking him places from his dark past. For Jack, BDSM is a way to resist his worst impulses. Yet, the stranger calling himself The Unknown seeks to use that to seduce him.

As Jack slips further down into the abyss, two men hold the power to save him. Will it be Gray, the Master who knows Jack's every secret? Or Jan, the first man to give Jack a reason to hope? With deadly ghosts coming out to play, Jack may lose everything, even his life.

Novel (120,000 words)
(M/M - For content labels and excerpt, see details on publisher's site.)

The author's site  (Jack L. Pyke) talks about a sequel in the works, as well as a collaborative project where two authors trade characters - wow, how fun does that sound? Can't tell you how many times I've wanted to borrow someone else's people and see how they fare in my demented world.

Anyway. Don't is freaking amazing. A-maze-ing. Couldn't put it down. Pretty much rocked my world. BDSM. M/M (and sometimes even another M in there)... suspense, scary bad guys... amazing good guys, really complicated main guy. Oh, yeah, and it's long - 120,000 words - you get a lot of story for your money. Yummy story.


Finished reading it today, ordered the paperback, and started reading the ebook all over again.

So there's that. I love a new obsession. Here's a link to the book on Goodreads, where there are some reviews to read, if you want to check them out.

That's all I got for coffee this morning, cuz I am wrecked.

Hope you're all looking forward to an amazing weekend!