|click for HAHAT blog hop|
Good morning, Darlings, and welcome to Trans Modified Cadets... er... Tripps Modeling Calves (Tripps being pants, calves being legs, get it, get it? No? Aw shit, never mind). Okay, okay, right again, this is your regularly scheduled Thursday Morning Coffee broadcast.
Welcome. We love you here. Well, I love you. I don't even know who the "we" would be. Voices in my head, perhaps, or the "rest" of me.
International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia is May 17th. (Which, should, by my best scientific calculation, be today). [Hee - go ahead, laugh at me, total date FAIL]
So. I signed up to participate in this Blog Hop for a good cause. Which is cool, yeah, and I'm in like Flynn and all of that, but seriously - could we come up with a better NAME, for fuck's sake? Because really, who comes up with this? As if Hop isn't already gay... (sorry, but you KNOW any "hop" against anything just sounds totally gay - and yeah, I'm married to a guy, but I'm STILL queer so I get to say it out loud and fuck you). We need to fix this name business. Seriously. Not that I don't think fucking like bunnies in the name of destroying hate is a fucking GENIUS idea - I do. Truly. I mean, if people even KNEW how awesomely hot gay sex was, we really wouldn't even be having this discussion, would we?
Yeah - try that on for size, straight people. You know how they used to say, "Once you go black, you never - " Okay, never mind. Bad example. We don't want to be racist while we Kick Ass and Fuck You All Over Homophobia and Transphobia. [Okay, that title is perhaps slightly too long]. We could simplify it, like I did for this blog title - Fuck OFF, Homophobia.
Except I didn't get the Transphobia part in there, did I? Well, shit. There's always a glitch somewhere.
Sigh. I don't know why they have to be commemorated all in the same day (or hop) in the first place. I mean homophobia is the one thing [a range of negative attitudes and feelings toward homosexuals] and transphobia, is a whole different thing, [a range of negative attitudes and feelings toward people who's internal gender identity doesn't match their external, or physical (or birth), gender assignment].
Of course, what they DO have in common is that there are plenty ignorant (and arrogant) assholes in the world who just can't seem to MIND THEIR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS IN OTHER PEOPLE'S BEDROOMS OR WHAT HAPPENS TO BE BETWEEN SOMEONE ELSE'S LEGS.
We live in a perverted society. It's a fact. (No, I didn't make it that way - sheesh, don't give me so much credit).
Back in my high school days, the perverts scoured rock music lyrics, immersing themselves in the evil so they could scream about the evil, the same as those people "educating themselves about porn" do. If you're going to spend HOURS of your life searching for porn and watching porn and talking about porn, there must be some perverse pleasure involved. Hey, let's not think about pink elephants, 'kay? No, no, pink elephants are BAD, don't think about them. Thinking about them gives them POWER over you.
Oh! Sorry, lost my topic there. Let me scroll up and see if I can find it again...
Perverted society - that's it. If we weren't, no one would CARE what happens in other people's bedrooms or what kind of plumbing exists between someone else's legs. It would be private. It would be not our business who sleeps with whom or who marries whom (btw - WOOT! I would like to take a moment here to give a huge shout-out to my home state, MN, for LEGALIZING gay marriage on MAY 13, 2013 - You GO, girl. I am PROUD to be MN born and raised).
Okay. To address the whole homophobia thing - Ya'all have heard of the Kinsey Scale, yes? It's like... a continuum of sexuality/sexual behavior blah blah blah. 0 on the left is utterly heterosexual, and 6 on the right is utterly homosexual. Most people fall somewhere in between. Which means... if the last person on earth besides yourself was a man, or even your twin brother, or, hell forbid, your childhood bully... you'd probably do him/her regardless of whatever sexual orientation you've claimed until this point. And yes, you'd find yourself physically capable. And probably enjoy it. Barring... you know, starvation or whatever.
I would plant myself at a solid 2, I think. I love my husband, but wouldn't necessarily kick a girl out of my bed (pretty sure I've said this before)... though it really depends on the girl.
Ten Ways Homophobia Affect Straight People
The Transphobic piece - you know, I probably don't "get it" much more than your average person does. I'd be the same me inside my head even if I changed my gender assignment, so I still would never escape myself. I had a brief period in... oh, 7th grade, maybe, when I thought how nice it would be to be a boy instead of a girl. But this was fleeting, and obviously NOT the kind of deep-seated gender discrepancy that Trans people experience. So imagine yourself trapped in a body that's all wrong, that doesn't at match WHO YOUR ARE - much more a medical problem than a psychological one.
Be aware that Trans people are not necessarily gay, although some may identify as gay... And please, please, please get this, too - if you feel confused about whether to address a Trans person as he/she Mr/Miss/Sir/Ma'am - there's an incredibly SIMPLE guideline...
Address the person using the gender identity that they are presenting to you. Don't worry about physiology (it's generally none of your business, anyway). If a person presents as male, address them as you would a male. If presenting as female, address as female. See? Easy and respectful and kind, all in one fell swoop.
A really great resource for Transgender information is Matt Kailey's blog, Tranifesto. I've spent hours browsing his blog (seeking information and education) and he's absolutely GREAT at explaining gender dysphoria, and his followers often make extensive and sometimes contradictory contributions to the discussion. You can even submit specific questions to Ask Matt - I have - and he answered (with a blog post) within just a few days.
Stop being scared. Gay people and Trans people are ultimately just... people. Some are assholes, some are not. They hurt and cry and bleed. They get hungry, angry, lonely, and tired. The gamut of emotion, the gamut of the trials and joys of living on this earth belong to ALL OF US - and often we are not all that much different from each other.
So how about this:
Stop sucking, people. I mean, how freaking hard is it to just be kind as you move about this earth space we all share? You'll never like everyone, and why should you? And honestly, if you're a ZERO on the Kinsey scale, the guy who's a SIX isn't interested in you anyway. Get over yourself and get a clue.
Hang out with people you like, and don't hang out with people you don't. It's pretty simple, really. There's no reason to be a jerk.
Just because it's awesome, here's a link to the It Gets Better Project, started by writer Dan Savage:
It Gets Better project.
So now I'm supposed to offer a PRIZE. Ha, and you think I didn't know you read through all my drivel specifically in order to get to the PRIZE part where you can win one one of my books. I'm savvy about these things.
Well, okay. Here's the deal. I'm going to make you work for it.
Yep. I'm not going to make you follow my blog or follow me on Twitter @SMJohnsonWrites, or repost my links or like my FB fan page, SM Johnson Writes . Nope.
What I need from you is this - Visit Matt Kailey's Blog or the It Gets Better Project.... and leave me a comment about something you saw on either site. And don't forget to leave me some way to contact you, either in your comment or by emailing a copy of your comment to DeVante9901 at aol dot com.
Then I'll either draw names out of a hat for a free ebook of mine... or offer one to everybody - since I hate to leave anyone out. I'll even let you choose which one you want. Because this is one area (there aren't many, sadly) in which I have the power of SM on my side. (Grin).
Now... spread the message - everyone go forth and fuck like bunnies and stamp out hate. Because hate sucks.